UPDATE: Not like there was any doubt, but the Texas State Board of Education approved the changes to the social studies and history curriculum we listed here last week. Who needs facts when there’s ideology? [MSNBC]
Archive for the ‘Wingnuts’ Category
Posted in Education, Lawmaking, Religion, Texas, Wingnuts, tagged Education, laws, racism, Religion, revisionist history, Science, Texas on 05/25/2010 | Leave a Comment »
Texas To Re-Write School Curriculum With Whitewashed Fantasies Of Guns, Dungarees, And The Baby Jeebus
Posted in Education, Racisms, Religion, Sicknesses, Terrorisms, Texas, The End of the World, Wingnuts, tagged atheism for the win!, evangelicals, everything's dumber in Texas, irony, revisionist history, school system, Texas, Zionist history on 05/18/2010 | 2 Comments »
Remember when America, and specifically, the United States, was mentioned by name, in the Bible, as the “chosen” nation? Yes you do, you liar. It was right there, in the Bible. Like, on page 8! Pfft. Whatever. It’ll be in the Texas school books sometime soon anyway, as proof. Cynthia Dunbar, Texas lawyer, wingnut, and [...]
When They Said “You” Can Keep the Insurance You Have, They Really Meant “Men”
Posted in Health, Lawmaking, Politicking, The End of the World, Wingnuts, tagged abortion rights, healthcare reform, women's rights on 05/17/2010 | Leave a Comment »
In this week’s health care initiative fail news, the health care overhaul that Democrats fought to pass into law, and abortion opponents (unsuccessfully) fought to block, is now being employed by said anti-abortionists to limit abortion coverage by private insurers. See? This is why crazies always win – they’re clever motherfuckers. Apparently, “an obscure part [...]
Mark Sanford Trying To Rekindle Sexin’ Relationship With Argentine Paramour…
Posted in Politicking, Sexytime, Wingnuts, tagged Argentina, Mark Sanford, old flames on 05/13/2010 | Leave a Comment »
…BY PUBLICLY ANNOUNCING TO REPORTERS THAT HE’S TRYING TO REKINDLE RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS ARGENTINE PARAMOUR: Gov. Sanford of South Carolina told reporters on Wednesday that he spent last weekend in Florida with his ex “side piece” trying to resuscitate their goings on. And we quote: “As a matter of record, everybody in this room knows [...]
Gay Sensation George Rekers Says He’s Not Gay
Posted in Sexytime, Traveling to the Foreigns, Wingnuts, tagged closeted republicans, George Rekers, liars, long stroke, Rentboy, self-loathing on 05/13/2010 | Leave a Comment »
George Rekers, Rentboy.com visitor, alleged long stroke enthusiast, and board member of the National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuality (NARTH), is now just a simple Rentboy.com visitor and alleged long stroke enthusiast, as he has resigned his post as a board member at NARTH. Because he’s not gay. From TPM Muckraker: “I am [...]
George Rekers Fancies The Long Stroke, And Who Doesn’t?!?
Posted in Sexytime, Traveling to the Foreigns, Wingnuts, tagged closeted republicans, George Rekers, Luck of Lucien, naked platonic rubdowns, Rentboy, Republican hijinks on 05/06/2010 | Leave a Comment »
Getting to the bottom of things here (shut up), it seems George Rekers’ rented boy, from Rentboy.com, is divulging details of their dalliance across Europe. Speaking with the Miami New Times, “Lucien” reveals that the pair did not, in fact, have sex. Lame. Instead, Rekers spent most of the days letting “Lucien” beat him off. [...]
George Rekers, Family Research Council Co-Founder, Likes It When Male Prostitutes Handle His Bags Across Europe
Posted in Sexytime, Traveling to the Foreigns, Wingnuts, tagged atavistic mustaches, closeted republicans, crotch-rubbing twinks, George Rekers, Republican hijinks, whoops on 05/05/2010 | Leave a Comment »
Remember when you took that vacation to Europe, and you needed help carrying your luggage, so you went online to Rentboy.com and found a gay male prostitute who helped you carry that luggage, and it was awesome, but some people took it the wrong way and were like, ‘Wait what the fuck?’ Well, the same [...]
California Rep Thinks We Should Round Up U.S Citizens And Deport ‘Em
Posted in Politicking, Racisms, The End of the World, Wingnuts, tagged Duncan D. Hunter, illegal immigrants, jesus h. christ, Mexicans!, Real Americans, tea parties on 04/29/2010 | Leave a Comment »
Republican Representative Duncan D. Hunter is a Real American. It is in his soul. Yup. In the barren recesses of his aortic valve, a baby bald eagle squawks for Liberty. How do I know? I just do. Okay? Oh, and because he said so. Hunter (R-Calif) was out Tea Partying last week or whatever, when [...]
Oklahoma Takes Women’s Rights Back A Century
Posted in Ladies, Lawmaking, Sexist, Sicknesses, The End of the World, Wingnuts, tagged ban everything, jesus h. christ, madness, Oklahoma! abortion rights, states to avoid on 04/28/2010 | Leave a Comment »
What the FUCK is going on in this country? Yesterday, the Oklahoma Legislature went ahead and overrode the governor’s vetoes, and passed two of the strictest abortions measure to date (or, since Roe v. Wade, anyway). The first measure requires not only that women undergo an ultrasound, but that doctors set up the monitor so [...]
Posted in Lawmaking, Racisms, Texas, The End of the World, Wingnuts, tagged Debbie Riddle, Don't Mess With Texas, illegal immigrants, unconstitutional things, Wingnuts on 04/28/2010 | Leave a Comment »
XENOPHOBIA IS CONTAGIOUS: You thought Arizona was bad enough. Well, here comes the next wingnut, Republican Representative Debbie Riddle, who says she plans to introduce a similar “get-tough” immigration measure in Texas in the January legislative session. Because the federal government isn’t doing its job or some shit, not because this country is disgustingly discriminatory, [...]
Michael Steele Has Stopped Trying
Posted in Politicking, Wingnuts, tagged black people don't vote so whatever, Michael Steele, real talk, republicans, yeah son on 04/22/2010 | Leave a Comment »
We haven’t posted about Michael Steele in forever, which is sad because, well it’s obvious why that is a sad thing. BUT! Money Mike was speaking for Depaul University students on Tuesday, and was asked this simple question: “Why should an African-American vote Republican?” BOOM: “You really don’t have a reason to, to be honest [...]
Virginia Governor Loves To Celebrate That Time The South Fought To Uphold Slavery
Posted in Politicking, Racisms, The End of the World, Wingnuts, tagged Bob McDonnell, celebrate the confederacy!, jesus christ, Virginia is for lovers...of slaves on 04/07/2010 | Leave a Comment »
APRIL IS CONFEDERATE HISTORY MONTH, AND THEY WILL BE PARTYIN’ LIKE IT’S 1859: I mean, what could be more patriotic than a month-long remembrance of fighting against your own country, the United States of America, in a war to maintain and uphold the profits of slavery?? Oh but it was about other things too! Mmmhmm [...]
Posted in Prisons, Sexist, Sicknesses, The End of the World, Wingnuts, tagged abortion rights or lackthereof, Utah on 03/05/2010 | Leave a Comment »
UPDATE: Remember that sweeping miscarriage statue in Utah that we posted about earlier this week? Well, the good news is the bill has been withdrawn and revised by the sponsor, Rep. Carl D. Wimmer (R), who removed the very controversial clause that would have allowed prosecution of “reckless” acts by women under the state’s criminal [...]
Utah Hopes To Criminalize Miscarriages
Posted in Prisons, Sexist, Sicknesses, Terrorisms, The End of the World, Wingnuts, tagged anti-abortion, anti-women, disgusting human beings, Utah, wtf on 02/24/2010 | 1 Comment »
A bill passed by the Utah House and Senate this week – and currently waiting the governor’s signature – will make it a crime for a woman to have a miscarriage, and make induced abortion a crime in some instances. The supposed purpose of the bill is to charge a woman with criminal homicide for [...]
Dick Cheney’s Fifth (!) Heart Attack Can’t Kill Him Either
Posted in Health, Sicknesses, Terrorisms, Wingnuts, tagged death, Dick Cheney, the undead on 02/23/2010 | Leave a Comment »
BECAUSE HE’S ALREADY DEAD? Ex-vice President Orlock underwent a stress test, heart catheterization, and was administered virgin blood at George Washington University Hospital today. He is said to be resting comfortably and is expected to be released in a day or two. [Wash Po]
Posted in Traveling to the Foreigns, Wingnuts, tagged heroes, Mitt Romney, whoopin ass on 02/16/2010 | Leave a Comment »
SOME GUY PUNCHED MITT ROMNEY ON A PLANE BECAUSE, WELL WOULDN’T YOU? “The man sitting in front of Ann Romney leaned his seat back, and when Mitt Romney asked him to move it upright before the plane took off, the man became physically violent.” Haha. Get ‘er done. [My Fox Pheonix]
Even Fox News Readers Are Like, ‘Yeah, The Tea Baggers Are Fucking Terrible’
Posted in Internet, Politicking, Racisms, The End of the World, Wingnuts, tagged crunching the numbers, Fox News, important things, new polls, teabaggers on 02/10/2010 | Leave a Comment »
HAHA: Here is the latest Fox News online poll thing, which confirms that the teabaggers will kill and consume us all sometime tomorrow, because of black people, ACORN, and socialism. [Fox News]
Posted in Politicking, Wingnuts, tagged Alabama, dicks, hooray, Richard Shelby, updates on 02/09/2010 | Leave a Comment »
RICHARD SHELBY (R-AL) LIFTS HOLDS ON OBAMA SENATE NOMINEES: But he sure got everyone’s attention about whatever Alabama earmark bullshit he was anglin’ for, yessiree! [The Hill]
Update #2! Richard Shelby Responds: ‘Barack Obama Loves The Terrorists, That’s Why’
Posted in Politicking, The End of the World, Wingnuts, tagged dear terrorists: please bomb Alabama, earmarks, Obama Administration, Richard Shelby, the terrorists have won maybe...wut? on 02/05/2010 | Leave a Comment »
JESUS H. CHRIST: Alabama Senator Richard Shelby’s office has finally confirmed to TPMDC that Shelby has in fact placed a hold on the President’s nominees because “blah blah blah … national security concerns … blah blah blah.” Those gosh darn terrorists are always ruining things for Americans, aren’t they? His spokesperson had this to say: [...]
Alabama Senator Blocks Obama Senate Nominations Because ‘Who Does This Guy Think He Is, President Or Some Shit?’ [UPDATE!]
Posted in Lawmaking, Politicking, Wingnuts, tagged Alabama, earmarks, Jim Crow era switcheroos, president Obama, Richard Shelby, Senate nominations on 02/05/2010 | Leave a Comment »
STORY SEEMS CRACKER-Y, LET’S INVESTIGATE: Sen. Richard Shelby (R-AL) has taken the historically unprecedented step of blocking all of President Obama’s Senate nominations, fueling speculation he is a) issuing the blanket hold on all the president’s nominees until his earmarks are approved, and b) he’s a smoldering asshole. (Shelby has been curiously mum on both [...]
National Review Person Not Named Jonah Goldberg Pens Sentence Of The Year
Posted in Racisms, The End of the World, Traveling to the Foreigns, Wingnuts, tagged cross-eyed people, Mark Krikorian, slavery over too soon, the Haiti problem on 01/21/2010 | 1 Comment »
MARK KRIKORIAN…GO: “My guess is that Haiti’s so screwed up because it wasn’t colonized long enough.” Those italics are all his, by the way. Oh, you want more? Well, Mark: “But, unlike Jamaicans and Bajans and Guadeloupeans, et al., after experiencing the worst of tropical colonial slavery, the Haitians didn’t stick around long enough to [...]
Jonah Goldberg’s Latest Column: Yeah I Know A Few Haitians So I Can Say This…Their Country Sucks
Posted in Sicknesses, The End of the World, Traveling to the Foreigns, Wingnuts, tagged fat slobs, God hates Haitians, Haiti, Jonah Goldberg, poor people like being poor, why nepotism sucks on 01/21/2010 | 1 Comment »
We here at CTJ are always tickled when we come across the racist, elitist spewings of some slob ignoramus or other on the interwebs. Enter The National Review’s Jonah Goldberg as Douchebag of the Day. Opining on the difficulties facing Haiti – their poverty, specifically – Goldberg argues that Haiti has a “poverty culture,” which [...]
Former Cosmo Centerfold Wins Special Massachusetts Election For Senate!
Posted in Politicking, Wingnuts, tagged health care reform, Martha Coakley, naked people, Scott Brown, Ted Kennedy on 01/20/2010 | Leave a Comment »
HUZZAH! This fine feller, Scott Brown, is your new Ted Kennedy!! And just like Ole Teddy, he is a Republican, hates health care reform, and will show you his long-ass pubes at the drop of a hat. One of those things is true! Martha Coakley, Brown’s opponent in the race, was defeated 52% to 47%, [...]
Rudolph Guiliani Lies About Everything (Again)
Posted in Politicking, TeeVee, Wingnuts, tagged actual unrepentant fucking liars, America's Perineum, rudy giuliani on 01/08/2010 | Leave a Comment »
Remember when 9/11 and the ‘shoe bomber’ and the anthrax attacks didn’t happen while George W. Bush was President? Neither does America’s Perineum, Rudolph Giuliani! Yes. The space between your ass and balls had this to say, on the Good Morning America television program, just a few short hours ago: “…we had no domestic attacks [...]
